


Loopholes

by starshipslytherin



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, M/M, Tumblr request
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-05
Updated: 2017-08-05
Packaged: 2018-12-11 12:00:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11713989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starshipslytherin/pseuds/starshipslytherin
Summary: To prank his well despised DADA professor, Umbridge, after she put up a decree that prohibits boys from being too close to girls, George Weasley ingeniously finds a loophole and eventually gets his twin brother and his best friend to fake date. Which, however, wasn't destined to last long in the first place, especially due to Lee's annoying crush on Fred.





	Loopholes

It didn't start out alright, and it didn't start out on purpose. Yet, it did. And in the very beginning there was a pink nightmare and the thirty-first one of her rules.  
"Boys and girls are not permitted to be within eight inches of each other", George Weasley read out aloud. "Bloody hell." He stepped a few feet back into the crowded hall and glanced back up, just to make sure he wasn't hallucinating. It was still there, though.  
"What about siblings?", his just as red haired and freckled brother Fred asked.  
George shrugged. "I dunno. Don't really have the urge to snuggle up to Ginny, though."  
"But, there's got to be a loophole - it would be worth it just to piss her off, wouldn't it? - Oi, Lee!", he called after his dreadlocked mate, who had just stumbled down the stairwell, "check this out."  
And with a frown, Lee did, then snorted. "This makes no bloody sense", he said. "And it's unfair! What if there's conjoined twins -"  
"They wouldn't be a boy and a girl, conjoined twins are always the same -", George started, then interrupted himself. "Freddie", he said slowly, a look of dawning realisation glowing on his face. "I've found the loophole, brother."  
"Genius", Fred grinned. "Lee? You in?"  
"In what?", Lee spluttered, thinking he had followed the direction this was going in, hoping he had, but not quite believing it.  
He had been having a stupid little crush on his best mate, one of them, at least, since day one, despite having been unable to name it until their fourth year when the burning realisation had come upon him all at once during a Quidditch match, Gryffindor vs. Slytherin. When he was watching Fred soar through the air and looking so pure, and he remembered letting out a series of curses McGonagall had taken for a reaction to the match, hence threatening him to end his career as a commentator. Obviously she hadn't believed him when he later tried to explain - but Fred was just so. Uh. Always there. If not in person, he was right in Lee's head. And he'd always been so different. So special. And it wasn't hard to tell the twins apart, because Fred had something about him Lee couldn't put his finger on, but it was something, and it was just Fred. To think he might get as much as a single touch, even if it was just to piss off Umbridge -  
"We're going to touch all the time, Freddie and I", George said proudly and high-fived his twin, who nodded gleefully.  
"Oh", Lee said quietly, disappointed.  
"Don't worry, mate, you get to watch", Fred said, "cheer us on, right?"  
"Right", said Lee, who was unable to keep his mouth from smiling at the sight of Fred's delight. "I'm in."

The first time the twins passed Umbridge arm in arm, nothing at all happened besides the usual disapproving glower the two parties shared, and a soft, disgusting 'hem-hem' was what they got when they took Lee between them, who was cushioned in warmth and cosiness because right there, he was given so much affection by the two idiots he loved most, in different ways, of course, but so, so much, and Fred nudged him.  
"See, it took you to get a reaction out of her", he said to him. "Seems like we're taking it one step further."  
Lee's face lit up.  
But again, he was - not quite disappointed this time, although it still wasn't enough. Not at all. And for once, he was glad the twins never knew where to stop, because in the end, he could see it coming, they'd snog each other senseless, all three of them. Which was a pleasant expectation, in spite of the little heartache that overcame Lee every time he told himself it wouldn't be real, at least not in the way he wanted it to be. And it would never last, because why would it?  
But it was enough when he was sitting on George's lap with Fred on his, and he didn't know where to put his arms because he was so overwhelmed with everything but it was alright and it didn't hurt so much any more because he was being held together so firmly.  
And the pink nightmare passed them, and they were stunned by the lack of reaction.  
That was because she was busy cursing a young Slytherin boy away from a blonde Hufflepuff girl, who had been tentatively holding his sweaty hand, and the two blushed and traded timid looks, then scampered off together, but with a foot of distance between them.

"So it's about couples", George figured out, reaching for another piece of nougat. "So all we've got to do to drive that old hag round the twist is do couple-y things together. I suggest -", he turned to Lee, whose heart was thumping dully in his chest, "you pick one of us to fake date, alright? No biggie?"  
"No biggie", Lee repeated with a grin and a suavely steady voice that felt so faint to him but it wasn't. "Just let me figure out who's the better looking twin."  
"Eh, we're sodding identical, mate!", Fred protested, slapping his arm with the back of his hand. The touch lingered.  
"Yeah, keep insisting just to boost your ego", Lee laughed, poking him at the very spot on his side where he knew exactly the redhead was beyond ticklish, causing him to let out a muffled squeal.  
"You see, you've already got the dynamics, but I've got the looks", George said, laying down on top of the two.  
"Nooo, my darling friend, pick me!", Fred exclaimed dramatically, wrapping an arm around Lee's shoulders. "I'm the better kisser -"  
"I thought we were talking about holding hands", Lee questioned, raising a brow. There was only so much he could take right now.  
"See, I'm the better hand-holder", George said.  
"My hands are softer", Fred protested. "And Lee likes me better, right? He'd pick me anytime."  
"Well", Lee frowned, "I wouldn't say so. However, George, haven't you been pining for Angelina? You do realise it would sort of turn her off if she saw you snogging another guy in the corridors."  
"Why're the two of you so obsessed with snogging?", George mockingly asked.  
"Well, I guess I won", Fred sighed, clutching a hand at his heart. "My darling Lee, thou shalt forever be mine -"  
"Be not afear'd, my dear, for I shall faithfully linger at thy side -"  
"Sun of my life -!"  
"Shut it!", George groaned with a chuckle in his voice, wriggling to his feet, 'accidentally' hitting his brother in the stomach. "You don't want to be that sappy, alright? And take it slow."  
"We shall obey, sir", Fred sang, and Lee saluted.

Fred had always been the softer twin. Which didn't mean he was less reckless or strong or brave - that, he was. However, he had an emotional side to him that George barely seemed to exhibit - he was the one who'd ask people if they were alright after a prank had backfired, or the one who'd be an adorable elder brother if he ever saw Ginny crying (not that she would do that a lot any more) or Ron being down about something. His ways were still rough and stormy and so much, but sometimes a hard punch to your shoulder or a too intense back rub were better than pity.  
And his positivity. Lee didn't know if it was just him, but Fred was just positive. And very caring despite being tactless and inconsiderate with his words sometimes. And it felt good, being treated as though you weren't as delicate as a raw egg.  
So later, when the dorm was asleep, Lee felt a body plummet down next to his. He didn't need to question who it was.  
"Alright, mate?", Fred asked.   
"'Course", Lee replied under his breath. "Can't sleep?"  
"Mm. Just thought we might grow accustomed to the mission, yeah? Bit of snuggling up? If you're okay with -"  
"I am", Lee blurted, and he was glad it was all dark around him. "Um - I mean, sure. Looking forward to dragging that toad -"  
"Yeah. You and I", Fred said quietly and lay down. "We're about to do a great job."  
"What're we supposed to do", Lee wondered, distracted by the redhead getting comfortable right there next to him. It might have been the millionth time, but boy, did it startle him. Especially now that he knew he'd get the ghost of what he felt was supposed to be, and that he would just keep trying to tell himself he'd be able to forget it wasn't all staged for a stupid prank. "Relationship wise. And we're going to need a backstory. If we want people to believe us. How we - you know - fell in - in love." Oh Merlin's dick, he was so heating up. Hoping the heat wasn't warming up the entire dormitory for everyone to notice.  
Fred huffed. "George thinks we should just stage it for Umbridge and tell the rest it's just for fun." And once again, Lee felt his heart disappointedly miss a beat, but Fred continued very quietly. "But I think it would be - you know - a lot safer to stage if for everyone. Make everyone believe it. Tell the world. Go in fully. Because if Umbridge learnt we'd been trying to mock her, we'd all be in tons of trouble."  
Lee snorted. "Since when do you care about getting in trouble?"  
Fred shifted a bit, tentatively and surprisingly softly putting a hand on Lee's waist and crept under the covers. He hummed. "You know I don't really."  
And Lee spent a lot of time thinking about that statement. He thought of a thousand conclusions, all of which were ridiculous, but he felt they were still more likely than what was actually the plain obvious.  
"You know, Freddie", he breathed when he was sure his friend was asleep. "I agree with you and not George. We'll be the school's best power couple. And we'd have the best kids. They'd so be master pranksters, Freddie."  
Fred let out a deep breath and started snoring a minute later.  
Lee wasn't so sure whether he'd heard, however, as it hadn't seemed to bother him, it was easy to fall asleep with him in his bed.

"Fred-die!", a cheerful voice interrupted the snuggly sleep Lee had been enjoying even in his dreams, where he and Fred got married with George being the priest, and in the very second before he got to kiss his groom, George gleefully whispered to them about how Umbridge was getting so wrecked.  
And he'd been awoken. By George ripping the curtains of Lee's four poster back and finding his best friend and his brother drooling, limbs entangled and Fred hogging the covers. "Getting in the mood, huh?"  
"We have mutually decided to stage it for everyone, not just Umbridge, because it would be safer", Lee declared, his heart pounding. Fred nodded in eager confirmation.  
Causing George to raise an eyebrow. "Since when do any of you give a single shit about any of that?"  
Since it's been determining how often I will get to fake snog your brother, Lee thought to himself, but said, "Well, I do think it's not always necessary to get into as many sno-, I mean, detentions as possible."   
George shook his head. "We were trying to set the record, remember?"  
"Yeah, but we'd be in serious trouble if -"  
"We should try getting ki-, um, detentions for other stuff and just snog - like, or hold hands or whatever and - it's going to be a good prank", Fred finished lamely, and he was so clearly nervous - Fred Weasley, nervous! - George just raised a brow.  
"I'm going to try and find Angelina", he announced, straightening his tie, and he wore a smirk Lee wasn't sure he liked. "You guys can go shower or something. Probably not since you're both disgusting smelly bastards. See you at breakfast."  
"Did you know skunks use their smell to attract their mates?", Fred called after him.  
"So that's your strategy, you sodding skunk", George retorted and slammed the door shut.  
"You into skunks or should I shower?", Fred asked Lee.  
The latter frowned. "I didn't even think about any body odours until now", he admitted.  
"So let us reek together, my fellow stinker", said Fred dramatically and threw an arm around Lee's shoulders so he could drag him downstairs into the common room, where George was hitting on Angelina in some corner.  
"He's just after you because Lee wants me and not him!", Fred yelled across the room for the Chaser to hear.  
"Shut it, you wank!", George groaned.  
"About time you fell in love, you dork", Angelina called at the same time.  
"Jealous?", Fred challenged, grabbing Lee and pulling him close. Demonstratively.  
"Remember boys and girls aren't supposed to get too close to each other, will you?", Lee winked at George and pulled Fred after him at his waist. They had some problems fitting through the portrait hole, they had to separate, and Fred immediately grabbed Lee's hand, who felt so whole because it was so. Right. It was just right.  
They ran downstairs, taking two or three steps at once when leaping down the great staircase, and when they saw something pink coming towards them - Umbridge, who was supervising Filch putting up another decree - Lee lost it and grabbed his pretend boyfriend and planted a kiss on his chapped lips. And felt that breath of his on his cupid's bow. And inhaled his scent. It was short, but good.  
And when Umbridge called after them - "Weasley ! Jordan!" - Lee didn't think, he grabbed the redhead's large hand and ran off, through the gates and outside, and it was way too crisp for that time of the year, the grass glittering with still fresh dew, and they didn't stop until they had reached the greenhouses, where their legs failed them and they let themselves fall onto the ground, panting and clutching at their stinging sides.  
"Godric Gryffindor's buttocks", Fred sighed. "I'm so screwed."  
"You?"  
"Both of us. Why - why did you do that?"   
Lee's heart sank at the sight of Fred's bewildered, blinking brown eyes, and he swallowed and it was as though a cold hand was squeezing his lungs together. It was time to be brave. This time. Not nosy or loud or annoying. Just brave enough.  
"Because I wanted to. Because I've been wanting to do this for longer than - for ages. And you've been making it so easy for me to just - forget this was all just a made up lie, just a prank and that it was actually nothing."  
Fred furrowed an eyebrow. "Who said it was? I - I've been dropping hints since last year -", he shook his head, then looked at Lee in the eye, "I thought I'd been obvious. Especially yesterday."  
"Well no, you hadn't. Because you're so bloody affectionate no one would be able to tell the difference", Lee laughed. "Damn. This is so scary because it's happening."  
"Frighteningly awesome", Fred frowned. "Wow."  
"Yeah." Lee reached over to intertwine their fingers, very carefully and holding his breath.  
Fred's head snapped up to look at him again. "So this -"  
"Is it the truth now?", Lee asked quietly.  
"True as can be", Fred said smoothly, a suave grin curling his lips and a soft pink blush tinting his freckled cheeks.  
"Wicked", Lee snorted, wiggling closer to the other boy.  
Fred huffed. "Bummer none of us knew sooner, eh? I've actually - very much tried to make it as obvious as possible."  
Lee snorted. "And I might have failed spectacularly at hiding it."  
"Merlin, we're probably just oblivious as fuck, the pair of us", Fred laughed.  
"So let's make sure it's gonna be worth the wait, eh?", Lee suggested, wiggling his brows, in hopes of achieving his desired outcome.  
Which he did. As Fred closed the distance between them again, and they kissed, properly this time. It tasted sweet and right and a bit of morning breath, but who would mind. They both reeked and didn't give a damn.  
"Damn right", Fred breathed against his lips.  
It didn't start out on purpose. But it was the best thing they had - two lads and their fluttering pulses, well hidden behind the greenhouses, and it was just right, just then, right there.

**Author's Note:**

> So I hope this turned out alright, especially because I have never even tried to write one of these people since abandoning a Draco Malfoy's sister fan fiction that I composed years ago and that I thankfully never had the audacity to publish.


End file.
